iCarly – iGoodbye, or How Do You Glue A Heart Back Together?

The series finale was this past weekend, and it would be remiss of me not to address the end of a show that has been precious to me, and two ships that I will sail into the vastness of eternity.

I have been a little obsessed with iCarly at two points in my life: once, in the summer of 2010, when I first began to watch it in earnest (though that wasn’t the first time I had ever seen an episode); and then a year ago in the fall of 2011, when I rewatched the whole series and wrote up a very detailed and thorough treatise on Spencer/Carly for this blog, (you can find that here: Part I, Part II Part I, Part II Part II).

I am not going to rehash anything I discussed in those entries (including any introduction to the show or the ships), I am just going to pick right up where I left off. So if you’re wondering how I could have this many feelings about a goofy children’s show, or how I could possibly ship Spencer and Carly, then I direct you therewards.

There have been 18 new episodes since I wrote those entries (almost half of them, hilariously, have aired within the last two months), and there really isn’t anything I feel the absolute need to address. iCarly has always been the type of show to maintain the status quo, and most continuity is just a running gag, so it’s not as if character development was ever something I needed to be worried about covering.

The show has conserved everything I love about Spencer and Carly’s relationship, so it’s a better description to say that the past 17 episodes (the ones before the finale) have been more of the same rather than to say that there was nothing worth mentioning.

If I was in the mood to rewatch all of those 17 episodes, do GIFs and screencaps, and describe certain scenes (and had the time to do all that), I’m sure I could fill quite a few pages with moments and commentaries in the same vein as what I discussed in the first three entries, but I am just going to focus on the finale and leave you with the knowledge that nothing has changed during those 17 episodes, but there also hasn’t been any more glorious accidental dates that you’ve missed out on hearing about.

I do want to briefly mention the episode iFind Spencer Friends (6.09). It did not introduce any new character development, but it sort of confirmed absolutely, canonically, and irretrievably the idea that Spencer will always be young and silly at heart.

Carly is throwing Spencer a birthday party, and finds the list of invitees to be rather unsatisfying. Basically, everyone she is inviting is her friend as well. Spencer doesn’t have any friends his own age, or any friends that he doesn’t share with Carly. (He does have the long time never-seen friend Socko, but he is on safari in Africa in this episode.)

Sam mentions – in an excellent, rarely-seen example of relevant continuity – Spencer’s book club (which we have seen twice in earlier episodes). If you’ll recall, I was a little threatened by Spencer’s book club – I didn’t want him falling in love with one of the ladies, and I also didn’t want him becoming a serious adult. But as Carly explains: Threat neutralized. I love that not only is Spencer no longer a part of the book club, but it was his own goofy actions that got him actually kicked out.

Carly gets Sam, Freddie, and Gibby to help her find some new friends for Spencer. It’s pretty hilarious the way they approach people randomly and try and get them interested in being friends with some guy they’ve never met. (They also only find guys…Carly, I think you’re showing your hand here.)

Carly has all of the new “friends”meet up for a meal, and it becomes quickly apparent that Spencer has nothing in common with these guys and does not enjoy their company, and vice verse. He ends up calling them mean and boring and flees the table. Carly, Freddie, and Sam are sitting off at another table, and you had better believe it’s not long before Spencer is over there sitting with them. Sam says, “Spencer, you need friends your own age,” and he basically says, “No, I don’t,” while crying into Carly’s shoulder.

You see the way she’s holding him, right? And I’m not supposed to ship this?

They end up going home, the main five of them, and Spencer blows out candles on a giant spaghetti taco.It could not have been more clear: these are Spencer’s friends. He doesn’t want anyone else, he doesn’t need anyone else. He’s happy with them, and they’re happy with him.(Emma Stone also has an awesome cameo in this episode. She mentioned on a talk show that she loves iCarly, so she’s on my list of fabulous people. Jimmy Fallon guest stars in a later episode, and Tina Fey makes an appearance. It’s pretty great.)You can imagine I was a little put off by Carly trying to “fix” Spencer’s life, and imposing, yet again, her idea of the way things she should be on everyone else, but I think she learns her lesson by the end. Even though she can go wayward sometimes, I just have to remind myself that she thinks she’s helping them: she does it out of love. Sometimes she’s just a little misguided.

If you’ve read my earlier entries, then you know that the Freddie/Sam ship (“Seddie”) is actually what got me watching iCarly in the first place, and I ship it like burning.

Taking that into consideration, my ideal finale for iCarly would have Spencer and Carly both single and still living together (with Carly having chosen a Seattle college), and Sam and Freddie together for good. In fact, as much as I berate this show maintaining its status quo to the point of driving someone insane, an ending that preserved the basic set up of the show would have been my best case scenario.

Dan Schneider, the showrunner, has expressed repeated impatience with the polarity and vitriol of the fandom where the Carly/Freddie/Sam love triangle is concerned, and has, in my opinion, at times, been disrespectful to the show’s fans and their investment in those relationships. (Leading me to wonder what he might do just in order to spite them.) While I have always considered the show to lean very strongly towards Seddie (and it is, as I understand it, the more popular ship as well), Dan Schneider has refused to drop Freddie/Carly (“Creddie”) entirely, which has always left me with a vague unease.

What’s worse is that he has created two iCarly spin-offs – one involving Gibby working at a recreation center and mentoring four “offbeat” middle schoolers, and another in which Sam and Cat (Ariana Grande’s character from Victorious) become roommates and start a babysitting business. I don’t consider spin-offs to be canon (unless I want them to be canon), so the idea that Sam might move to LA and never see Carly or Freddie or Spencer again doesn’t really bother me. But what does bother me is the fact that iCarly might have ended in a way that sets up those spin-offs.

I always go to Buffy the Vampire Slayer when I discuss spin-offs and how they f–k things up. Buffy’s canon “true love” leaves after the third season to have his own show, Angel. Was it always Joss Whedon’s plan to break Buffy and Angel up seemingly for good? To send Angel away until the show was over? Probably not. Cordelia goes with him, ending all chances for Xander and Cordelia to ever be together again or end up together. Spike dies in the series finale, and then through some magic ends up on Angel, becoming a regular on that show. I can ignore the way he did a pretty good impression of basically forgetting about Buffy and giving up on the love he sacrificed everything for, because I don’t consider spin-offs canon. But did Whedon kill Spike off so that he could join Angel for its fifth season? Basically, spin-offs f—k things up.

So I went into the finale of iCarly wary. Wary of spin-offs, wary of Dan Schneider the troll.

Overall, it was good. I cried, which I wasn’t sure if I would. It gave each relationship its due, for the most part. None of my absolute worst fears came true. Taking into consideration the external factors (the spin-offs, Dan Schneider’s tomfoolery, the fact that this is a finale and a finale episode sometimes requires upheaval), I am mostly satisfied.

This show isn’t known for its build-up. iOMG, the episode that launched Sam and Freddie’s canon relationship, had no special build-up whatsoever. Romantic feelings tend to be very spontaneous on this show. (Even when they make sense, or have felt inevitable.) So I had lived in terror that Dan Schneider would introduce a “true love” for either Spencer or Carly or both in the finale. (Not that I, in my shipping talent, could not have spun that into non-existence.) But this was not the case. In fact, I have to applaud, because Dan Schneider took that concept and turned it on its head.

Oh, and this is probably a little awkwardly placed, but before I continue, I just wanted to remind everyone that Spencer is actually four years or so younger than Jerry Trainor. Jerry has aged out of that indeterminate 20’s/early 30’s stage of life, which becomes a little bit more obvious when he’s playing Spencer as more serious, like in this episode. It’s a bit harder to imagine Spencer and Carly romantically when he he looks mid-late thirties and baby-faced Miranda could pass for a middle schooler if she wanted. But the actual age difference between Spencer and Carly is not as dramatic as the quite visual 16.5 year difference between Jerry and Miranda. I just felt like stating that.

The episode begins with an ode to the earlier seasons – the first scene takes place at their school, and Mrs. Briggs, who has not been seen in years, makes an appearance. T-Bo, Lewbert, and Mrs. Benson are also shoehorned in for the sake of it being the finale episode (and Socko gets a mention, but no face), though I would have liked also to have seen Nevel, Principal Franklin, and Guppy to give the show’s recurring characters a more complete send off. (A visit from Sam’s twin sister Melanie would not have gone awry, either, nor a mention of Pam Puckett.)

O rly? Because I can think of no less than one billion things you could have cut to make room for these unresolved threads.

The plot of the episode centers around Carly’s desire to go with her father to the father/daughter dance at the nearby Air Force base. Her father used to take her to the dance all the time when she was little, and she had always considered it a special thing. When he texts her that he will not be able to make it, Carly gets quite down about it. (Colonel Steven Shay, Spencer and Carly’s father, has never appeared on the show, but he has been mentioned often enough that it doesn’t feel like he’s a complete non-entity.)

While Carly is moping, Freddie, Sam, and Gibby go to her apartment, where Spencer is restoring a motorcycle for Socko. While Sam drools over the bike, Spencer gets a call from Audrey, who is apparently the only he girl he has dated whom he was really in love with, the “most important girlfriend” he has ever had. She has a layover in Seattle and he has made plans to have dinner with her at the airport.

You can imagine how I was feeling during this part. Basically one of my worst fears for the finale was unfolding before my very eyes. (Even though it’s sort of a continuity error, since Carly says in iDo that Spencer hasn’t been in a serious relationship since high school, and Spencer implies that he met this girl at law school.)

Spencer asks a little impatiently, “Where’s the teenage girl that actually lives here?”

I spent quite a few paragraphs in my earlier entries delighting in the fact that as much as Spencer loves those kids, he does express frustration often enough with Sam and Freddie coming over. Sometimes he just wants Carly to himself.

Spencer invites Sam to help him work on the motorcycle, and the two of them have quite a few scenes together in this episode. They’ve had a few storylines together like this in the past, but not more than half a dozen or so at the most, so I did think it was sort of a strange choice for the finale.

Socko is giving the bike to his cousin for his birthday, so Spencer is working on a deadline, and Sam is almost out-of-character in her desire to help Spencer finish the bike on time and get a good price on the parts he needs. She’s just not usually that nice or that considerate. And definitely not that hardworking. Since this is the finale, I think I’m going to call it character growth.

When Carly finally trudges morosely home, Spencer asks why she’s so sad when she hasn’t been to the father/daughter dance in four years. This brings up an interesting question. Even though he wasn’t present for the only holiday episode that we have had, I would have guessed that he had been back to visit his children at least a few times.  But we know that Colonel Shay has no idea that Spencer dropped out of law school, something that happened before the show began. In iMeet the First Lady (5.10), an episode in which Colonel Shay has a visit planned that doesn’t end up happening, we see Spencer preparing to fool his father into thinking that he is now a lawyer. He has to explain to everyone what he is doing, which implies that this is the first time that he has had to do it. We learn in this episode that Colonel Shay still doesn’t know that Spencer didn’t finish law school, and has also never met Gibby. So I feel like the stronger implication is towards the fact that Colonel Shay truly has never been back to see his kids during the run of the series. And it is not clear how much time has passed on the show, but I find it hard to believe that it has been less than four years.Carly informs us that this is the last year that she can go, after that she’ll be past the “daughter age limit”. So finally it makes sense why she had her heart set on this dance.

Spencer makes fun of her for being old. Carly is not in the mood for jokes, but she still cracks a smile for him. I can’t move on without mentioning how delightful it is that he is being confronted with Carly being a young woman and not a child anymore. (And I can’t help but think that this cut off would be 18 years old, making her 17. Though I’ll concede it’s possible that the cut off age is younger.)

There isn’t much on this show to mark the passage of time, and this is one of the few references ever to the fact that Carly is getting older. If you do the math, equating show time to real time, she should have graduated already. Since that’s obviously not the case, we have to assume there’s not a 1:1 correlation. But Carly, Freddie, and Sam do an iCarly webisode once a week, and there’s usually at least one iCarly in each episode. Which means we’re definitely not moving at a True Blood snail’s pace with each episode equaling one day.

I had been expecting the finale to contain some talk of senior year and college. It would make a certain amount of sense for the show to end with our characters splitting up after high school ended. One of my other worst fears for the finale was Carly going off to college in some far away place. But as far as I can tell, this episode treats her as if she’s just in the middle of high school – at least, that college isn’t looming over her. Sam having her driver’s license is one of the only ways we’re able to mark their ages at all.

Spencer, of course, can’t stand to see Carly bummed, and is always there to do whatever he can for her no matter what, so he says, “I know I’m not Dad, but…” and offers to take her to the dance, even though he knows that it’s on Saturday night, the same night that he is supposed to meet the-one-that-got-away, Audrey, at the airport.

Carly can hardly even believe it’s true.

Look at her face! The disbelief, the wonder, the knowing smile that Spencer is the best big brother ever. And she doesn’t even know what he’s giving up in order to take her!

Sam is flailing in the back, trying to remind Spencer that that he already has plans that night. But Spencer remembers, and he desperately doesn’t want Carly to know. He even tells her: “I don’t have anything going on Saturday night. Can I take you to the dance?” He keeps interrupting Sam and shushing her until she shuts up. And then he just asks Carly again, even more heartily:

OH. MY. HEART.

THESE TWO.

GAH.

My first thought was that Spencer isn’t in the Air Force, so I don’t really see how he’s going to get on base let alone take her to an event for servicemen, but whatever.

Carly gets excited. And I don’t mean a slow, grateful smile, and a forced effort to make herself look cheered up because has done something nice for her. No, girl is on cloud nine. She runs into his arms.And Sam totally ships it:And the hug keeps going, the way their hugs tend to do:She tells him, “I’m so excited!” and begins babbling happily about all of the things she’s going to do to get ready for their special night – she’s going to do her hair, and get a mani/pedi, and buy a new dress.

Spencer taking her isn’t just an acceptable solution to her disappointment, she’s actually uncontainably giddy about her new plans to go with him. (And remains so.)

I mean, just think about it, if your Dad, whom you never see, is coming home to take you to a dance, of course you’re going to get dolled up because it’s a very special occasion. But even though it’s just Spencer taking her, someone she sees everyday, to a dance that isn’t going to have any males her age and is basically for children, she is still going all out. (And I doubt that mani/pedis and getting her hair done were part of the tradition when she used to go as a little girl, so chalking that up to tradition isn’t going to fly with me.)

Basically, this time it’s not going to be an accidental date. IT’S GOING TO BE A REAL ONE.

And let just interrupt with some pictures of Jerry Trainor and Miranda Cosgrove from that day of filming:

Dan Schneider tells the cast about how he’s going to screw all of his fans over.

Spencer wakes up sick the day of the dance, after Lewbert, the doorman, sneezed on him. And I don’t mean a little sick, I mean he’s totally out of it and has a temperature of 103. That’s a little unrealistic – not only does he get sick but he’s so sick he can barely stand up for a minute straight? And it’s not like this is the flu – it’s a cold. But this is TV. He does his best to hide this from Carly. He desperately does not want her to know.

Carly is still really excited about the dance, so much so that she runs out of the house right after waking up to do her errands while still wearing her pajamas.

Spencer gets dressed in his tux, and is out in the living room waiting for her.

She comes down the stairs, all excited and pretty.He watches her come down the stairs, all dressed up. Yeah, that’s right. That’s what happens. And I know it’s mostly because he’s trying to not reveal to her that he’s cough-y and sneeze-y and lightheaded, but he almost looks nervous:He wants her to acknowledge that he’s all dressed up:And she says, “Who’s all handsome in his fancy tuxedo?”

And he says, “Me!” He needs a haircut (why didn’t he just keep it short like seasons 1, 4, and 5? Why!!!!), but he looks alright, I guess.

Carly really does think so:And Carly is like touching her neck and playing with her hair or some such thing:I didn’t notice until I was screencapping, and then I was just like, “What is she doing?” We’ll never know if she was actually adjusting something that needed adjusting, or just felt the need to touch herself there. (Which is sort of a trademark flirty/lustful gesture.)

And Spencer’s wearing the specialist of his special light up socks. Which is just too perfect. Carly likes them:I absolutely love her dress, and she looks amazing. It’s not super short, but it’s a little short, don’t you think? I wonder if Carly would have chosen the same dress if she were going with her father? Because I very much enjoy thinking that she bought that with Spencer in mind.

Spencer thinks that she looks amazing too: he tells her, “You look so pretty.” And she’s flattered: “Awwww, thanks!”

I don’t find anything atypical or particularly suggestive about the fact that they’ve exchanged look-based compliments – it seems like that’s what anyone would do when someone has gotten dressed up. But the actual delivery/reception of the compliments sent my shipper heart fluttering.

Carly asks all perkily, “Are you ready to go dancing?”He’s not just escorting her to an event called a “dance”, she has definite plans for the two of them to be dancing together.

Spencer, dear, this is NOT how you dress for a father/daughter dance.

(This reminds me of the father/daughter dance they had on Pretty Little Liars. Even ignoring the fact that the men on that show are all kinds of sketch and the gorgeous girls who play the daughters are all in real life in their 20’s, almost everyone on the message boards thought that the scene where all the girls slow dance with their fathers gave off all the wrong vibes, especially between the scantily-clad Spencer and her super hot Dad.)

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And Spencer is all ready to go dancing, and then…he faints.

Nooooooooooooooo!

I knew he was so sick that he never would have made it to the dance (though I think The Adventures of Hallucinating Spencer Shay at the Air Force Dance would have been much funnier than almost anything else that has ever happened on this show.)

So, no date, unfortunately.

On the plus side (and I always find the plus side!), Carly takes advantage of this opportunity to basically touch Spencer all over everywhere for a long time. (I think she has been watching Arrow and taking notes.)

I’m going to spam you right now with caps:She keeps touching his face and his hand, and then taking her hand away from those places, and then putting her hand back.

And Jerry and Miranda:(LOL, that red cat thing. He knows what’s up.)

Well, Carly is a mess after that. I’d think she’s actually even more disappointed about not being able go to the dance with Spencer than she was initially about not being able to go with her father, except that I’m sure her already being dressed up and about to walk out the door was probably also factor. She cries while eating frosting and cake batter with Sam. I love this girl.

The episode begins to make less sense from this point on. Carly is up moping in her room, but Spencer has been off the grid for a while (presumably sleeping) and has now returned and seems be at much better. Where as he could barely stand up before, he’s now walking around and talking with Sam about the bike. He is definitely well enough to take Carly to the dance at this point, even if he’s not going to be dancing the Macarena.

Socko ends up not needing the bike, and gives it to Spencer. Spencer plays with Sam a little, and then eventually reveals that he is going to give it to her. She is blown away.This is definitely the most serious scene we’ve ever had been Spencer and Sam. She asks, “Why would you give it to me?” And he says, “Because you’re a great best friend to my little sister.” (I’d say that in general that’s debatable, because as close of friends as they are – more than sisters, really – Sam often takes advantage of Carly. But just as this episode showed Sam as being really thoughtful where Spencer and Socko were concerned, it also showcased Sam as being particularly caring towards Carly and the pain that Carly was going through.) “And you’ve got a good heart. And you deserve it,” Spencer finishes. Awwww.

The Spencer/Sam (“Spam”) shippers were pretty ecstatic. It did feel a little like a ship tease. If things were A LOT different, I might have thought Dan Schneider was trying to subtly hint at a Spam/Creddie endgame. As it is, I think this scene was much more about Sam. Her story has always been the saddest. Getting this bike was a moment of triumph for her. She did deserve it, and she got it. I think that a very important factor here is the idea that Sam gets something in this finale. It may just be a bike, but it’s the bike that she has apparently always wanted. (I also have to wonder if Sam’s bike is going to be part of her shtick on Sam and Cat.)

As for Sam and Spencer’s relationship, a scene like this was sort of due for these two, because Sam takes advantage of Spencer, and Spencer despite being there for her when needed (but only serving as an extension of Carly), doesn’t ever treat her in an appreciative manner, and can sometimes be downright impolite. I’m kind of torn here, between respecting these characters and their relationship, and trying to spin this as a Spencer/Carly scene by showing 1) that Spencer has really cemented himself in Carly’s life by having good, strong relationships with everyone else in her life, i.e. her best friend Sam, and 2) that Spencer doing things for Sam and liking Sam and caring about Sam is first and foremost a product of seeing Sam as a necessary part of Carly.

Sam calls up Freddie, and says, “I have to talk to you about something important.”

“You want to get back together?” Freddie asks.

“What?” she asks, totally taken-aback.

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“Wait…do you?”

“Uh…I just…what’s up?”

And then Sam tells him about the situation with Carly.

This is pretty much the only Seddie scene in the episode. It’s the only time in the entire episode that these two main characters even really talked to each other. I knew Dan Schneider couldn’t be so impossible of a man as to never bring up the romantic side of their relationship at all in the final episode (or did I?), but as I mentioned, my hope was that they would actually get back together. I think this conversation showed, without any spin needed, that they both do want that. But it doesn’t actually happen. And it should have. We should have gotten that. The characters deserved it, the fans deserved it, the relationship deserved it.

And the scene is really not that great. Who would respond to that like that?

I mean, I don’t take a lot of chances by getting my hopes up. I don’t usually try to believe anything about the future with too much assurance. But I truly believed that a Sam/Freddie endgame was going to happen. So, based on my cautious nature alone, I can tell you that something here is wrong. In fact, I’m so bewildered, I can barely even be angry about it. (And yet, I manage.)

Freddie and Gibby show up in tuxes and offer to take Carly to the dance, but this only makes Carly, who was already crying, start crying even harder.

YES!

(I think they might have realized from the start that if Carly considered taking a friend to the dance an acceptable solution she would have outright asked them back when she first found out that her father couldn’t come. )

“I’m sorry, I’m just, I don’t know, it’s hard to explain, I’m just really upset,” Carly explains through her tears. “Look, you guys, I so appreciate you going to all this trouble for me, but the dance was supposed to be a father/daughter thing. I was OK with Spencer taking me, but even if I went with Spencer, it’s still not the same. And now I just want this night to be over. I don’t want to go to the dance with anyone.”

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So, I went to such trouble to show how excited Carly was when Spencer first offered to take her (and when she was starting to get ready the morning of the dance, and when she was standing at the door about to leave for it) to demonstrate that her saying that she was only “OK” with Spencer taking her is total hogwash. That girl was over the moon when she thought she was going with Spencer. I really don’t think the idea that it was anything less than the most awesome thing ever was visible. I could see her not considering it quite the same but still being grateful to Spencer and still deciding to go with him – that would make sense – but that’s not what they showed us. They showed us a Carly who was THRILLED to be going with Spencer. (Maybe she’s just trying to spare her friends’ feelings.)

Well, if you hadn’t already guessed it, of course Colonel Shay shows up right then. While a part of me feared Freddie would end up taking Carly to the dance and they’d have a big love scene, I figured all along that their Dad would make it. (Though he was coming from Italy, on a commercial airliner, so he should have known at least half a day in advance that he was coming. He might have said something.)

Seeing Colonel Shay is a pretty big deal, and a nice surprise for the finale. Definitely finale-material. (Also: he is not a bad looking man. I wouldn’t mind being Carly and Spencer’s stepmother. And considering the fact that this guy is father to two of my favorite fictional characters in the world, he could definitely be doing worse in the other not-looks departments as well.)

Of course Carly is overjoyed, and Spencer runs out and actually picks his father up.

Here’s the thing I don’t get: clearly it’s not too late for the dance, and Spencer is clearly feeling almost 100% better now. Why couldn’t he have taken her? Right up until the moment their father walked through the door, it would have made sense for Spencer to still take her.

Now, given the age gap between Spencer and Carly, and the fact that he has essentially been her guardian this whole time, you might think I wouldn’t want him taking her to a father/daughter dance because I don’t want him cast into the role of “father”. But the way Freddie and Gibby were going to take her – well it tells me that he was just a substitute date, not a substitute father. And, as we’ve already established many times, Spencer can be responsible and he can take care of her, but he is no paternal figure. (Though this is making me wonder why Carly didn’t invite her grandfather to take her?)

When Carly and her dad return, Spencer and the others are having a crazy hat/spaghetti tacos/crazy dancing party, which is a perfect homage to the show in general and to the first episode. Carly starts talking excitedly about all of the things that she, Spencer, and her father are going to do while he’s visiting, when he lays down the bomb that he has to leave that night.

Carly doesn’t take it well, despite the fact that he flew around the world to take her to some stupid dance.

So then Colonel Shay invites her to come with him.

HOLD UP.

WAIT.

WHAT?

His base is near Florence, and apparently lots of other officers have their families living there, and there is a school.

As if you didn’t need another reason to choose the Air Force over the other branches of the armed forces: A BASE IN ITALY.

The “there’s a school” is another indication to me that Carly is not graduating. I doubt he means a university.

Of course Carly thinks the idea is a little crazy at first, and she says, “What about my friends,” and looks at Sam, who encourages her to go, and she says, “What about iCarly?” and looks at the others (and Sam says, “The internet will still be here when you get back”, which is an important indication that this is a finite trip and iCarly the webshow is not over over) .

And then she turns to Spencer,

walks over to him, and says, “What about…?” and trails off.

WHAT ABOUT US? WHAT ABOUT MY LOVE AFFAIR WITH MY BROTHER? I think that’s probably what she was going to say. WHAT ABOUT OUR INCESTUOUS LOVE? WHAT ABOUT ME AND SPENCER TOGETHER FOREVER?

All joking aside, just think about this. “But what about…” She doesn’t even know what to say. How do you put what she’s considering giving up into words? It’s almost inconceivable that she would leave Spencer. There aren’t even words for the idea.

Just look at his face! Kill me.

Of course Spencer encourages her to go to Italy, to go be with Dad.And even though there’s a weak smile on his face, she really can’t muster one. The leaving Spencer part will never be OK.Then Colonel Shay says something about there being a lot of good-looking boys her age in Italy, and Carly, comedic, instantly agrees to go.

ETA: Drew from the comments had a brilliant thought about Carly’s instant agreement to go to Italy after the “boys” comment being slightly suspicious. Here she is having this intense moment with Spencer about the inconceivability of her leaving him, maybe she’s worried it’s starting to make her look a little overly attached, if you know what I mean. She probably thought she had better quickly (and it was too quickly!) show some interest in these other boys before anyone gets any ideas. And not just boys in Italy, but boys her “age”, which we know that Spencer is not.

I can even see Steven, after only observing Spencer and Carly for these past few hours, deciding that they’re a little too codependent, and wondering if maybe he ought to force them apart for their own good. I just imagine Carly droning on and on about Spencer while they were at the dance.

They do a final iCarly, with odes to the most popular recurring segments – like baby Spencer,and the cowgirl who thought the dude’s mustache was a squirrel, or whatever it’s called. It was perfect.

(That reminds me, and just allow me to vent for a minute, I hate when someone sees the characters, and recognizes them right away as the iCarly cast, but doesn’t recognize Spencer. And also that he is never invited to web-panels, or things like that. In the Jimmy Fallon episode, Jimmy says he loves iCarly and invites them to come be guests on his talk show, but not only is Spencer not invited, Jimmy doesn’t even recognize him while he’s walking around on set. SPENCER IS ON THE SHOW ALL THE TIME, and even when he doesn’t actually appear, he’s often mentioned. As I just pointed out, he’s always in the Baby Spencer segment, plus he’s often in those silly videos they do to fill time, like the one where he pretends to woo a watermelon, and he has also co-hosted, plus he’s often involved in building the props and mentioned for that reason. I feel like anyone who watched iCarly, even casually or occasionally, would know exactly who he was.)

Carly makes the announcement on the show that iCarly isn’t ending, it’s just taking a break. (A reason to not consider the Sam spin-off canon, as far as I’m concerned.)

Carly and Sam signing off at the end of the webisode is really hard to watch. The extended title sequence with a lot of clips from older episodes and showing them aging got me a little teary-eyed,

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but the end of their broadcast made me downright weepy.

Carly and Spencer have a big goodbye scene in her bedroom while she’s packing.

It’s pretty epic.

He’s sitting on her bed, in the whimsical room that he created for her, just watching her put stuff in her suitcase. He may have encouraged her to go, but he’s not even pretending to be excited about this great opportunity for her. He’s sad. There’s no better way to put it.

Do you see this thing he is doing with his feet:He just doesn’t know what to do. He’s distraught.She looks up at him, then quickly back down again. They don’t make eye contact, she’s just watching him and he’s sort of staring sadly out into space.

It’s just such a difficult, impossible situation for them. Impossible for them to be separated, impossible for them to use words to talk about how they’re feeling.

They’re nervous, and uncomfortable.

She makes a half smile, which I think is the sort of smile you make when it’s almost amusing how much you don’t know what to say or what to do. It’s her alternative to shuffling her feet.He says, “I’m going to miss you.”And she says, “Don’t.”

And he goes, “What?” in this way like he’s offended that she’s not going to let him talk about his obviously overwhelming feelings. Like it’s bad enough for him that she’s leaving but now she’s going to deny him their big emotional moment, too.“Don’t make me cry,” she responds. She’s shutting him down because she can’t go there.OH MY GOD. IT HURTS. IT HURTS. STOP THE RIDE I WANT TO GET OFF.

That first little exchange of dialogue is absolutely amazing. The caliber of the writing (I mean, they don’t say very much, but there’s something just so…right about it), the delivery by Miranda and Jerry (especially Jerry, curse him and the things he is making me feel!) – it belongs to a much sadder scene in a much more serious show. The scene starts off without any music, which is just brutal. Just raw, naked emotion right there in front of you. It’s especially hard taken with Spencer’s shrug and “What?” because you can hear in his voice how upset he is (not just sad about her leaving, but this sort of tangible misery) and there’s no music to take the edge off or make it seem cinematic.

Then the music starts up, and while I don’t want to call the music bad, I think it’s a little too simple. It’s the right mood, but the quality just reminds me that I’m watching a show that is typically goofy, where as the first few lines of dialogue in this scene made me feel like I was there, with them, and my heart was being torn from my chest. The music reminded me a little of a soap opera. I think the biggest problem is that despite the fact that music is pretty and serious, it sort of puts an end to that beautiful and heartbreaking exposure of the first part of the scene. The music tells us how to feel, but in the first part, we had to figure out how to feel by ourselves, and what we felt was an agony that the actors brought us to.

Because Spencer just comes across as so hopeless and gutted here. This scene is not about him being sad that she’s leaving but ultimately happy for her. This is a scene about these two people being ripped apart.

Too much exaggeration for you? Here’s some more:

I’m going too far with this, like I was always do, but it reminded me a bit of Torn Apart (or La Coupure, 2007, Chateauvert), which is probably my favorite movie that tells the story of a canon incest couple – at least in terms of what happens with the story. And I had might as well just take the opportunity to mention it anyway, questionable relevance aside. I’ve only seen it once, a few years ago, so a lot of the details escape me. There’s a brother and a sister who used to be together sexually but now they’re adults and she’s married with a child. There’s still this huge intensity to their relationship, and he wants her to leave her husband and be with him, but she is planning to move with her husband far away. I love this movie because it twists your perceptions of what’s going on. I’m about to spoil the end so skip the rest of the paragraph if you don’t want to know. They make it seem like the brother is really pushy and trying force her into something that she doesn’t want, but in the end you discover that the only reason she is leaving is because of how much she loves him. Because she’s trying to escape this all-consuming love that she has for him. There’s a scene where he comes over to her house and is sort of harassing her about moving, and it reminds me a lot of this scene between Spencer and Carly, just because you can feel the devastation these two people have at the idea of being apart. She might even be packing!

OK, I’m hitting the first part of this scene into the ground – I realize that – but it had this quality that I seem unable to describe and I just want you to feel what I feel. Spencer often has this facade. It’s not like he’s blocked off emotionally – this isn’t Oliver Queen – but because this is a comedy, and a silly show, he just only has a handful of moments where that comedy facade isn’t up. And this is one of them. He is genuinely upset, and we’ve never really seen that, except for the episode this is going to remind everyone of – iWanna Stay With Spencer – when Carly almost moves to Yakima with their grandfather. Basically, seeing “this is not OK” on Spencer’s face is really rough.

(And, of course, I think the fact that this is a real goodbye for the actors was a major element. There’s genuine non-acting sadness here.)

Carly looks at him for a minute…

Just look at her face! She knows she has to say something to him, but she doesn’t want to, and she doesn’t know what to say. She doesn’t want to have a big, emotional moment with tears and hugging, maybe even because she thinks it’ll make her change her mind. (Well, I can pretend that’s why.) It’s easier to just shut it off.

And then she sits down on the bed. But not next to him on the bed, which I thought was a little odd.She looks away at first, but then up at him.

She sighs, it’s almost a half laugh, it’s the same as the smile before, where she’s just faced with the impossibility of knowing what to do or say.

“Thanks for taking care of me,” she says, in such a way that you know she realizes it’s totally inadequate.

“Come on, we both know I’m a big, tall goofy man-child: you took care of yourself.”

She laughs, and there’s a laugh track. But I don’t think it takes anything away from the moment. He puts his hand down on the bed and leans towards her a little bit, and then she puts her hand down on the bed, and leans towards him too, but their hands are still about a foot apart. IT’S VERY STRANGE. Why aren’t they closer?

Maybe they know they couldn’t be closer, because of what might happen. Maybe the director was even like, “Uh, guys, I think we need some more space here.”

“Yeah,” she says softly. “Maybe in some ways. But…you’ve always made me laugh. And…feel safe. And shown me that being a grown up doesn’t mean you have to stop being silly. And creative. And fun.”(I just want to point out that these GIFs are set to move very quickly; Miranda actually delivers these lines very slowly and heavily.)

“Well, now you made me cry,” Spencer says.

OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. THE FEELS. Spencer is crying. And Carly is crying. And I’m crying. Jerry is crying. Miranda is crying. WE’RE ALL CRYING. I cried when I watched it. I’m crying now, hours later, as I type this. Like, on tumblr, you always see those posts about crying over fictional characters, but how often are we actually crying? But holy rusted metal, I am crying right now.

I don’t know about Miranda, but Jerry is definitely genuinely crying here and not just acting.I don’t even really feel the need to comment on what Carly said, because it’s all so of course. It’s all true, and we’ve all known all of it all along. But it’s just the perfect acknowledgement and articulation of everything I love about these characters, and about them together, and  all the reasons why they’re so right for each other.

And tears running down my face.

She stands up, walks over to him, and then he rises and they hug.Again, a much more serious hug for a much more serious scene.

Look closely at her face. It hurts me. The expression on her face physically pains me.

She tried to keep the mood up for the first part of the scene through smiling but she’s not smiling here.

“I love you,” she says. And I want to kiss Miranda because she says it so well here. I mean, of course she loves him. But the way she says “I love you” right here is like, I don’t know, like in a way she’s saying it for the first time. Like it has to be an “I love you” that’s big enough and special enough for the situation, and it is.

“I love you, too, kid,” he responds. His is a bit more dutiful. You can hear in his voice that he’s crying (and Carly is sniffling), but his is more like an “of course I love you, you’re leaving and I’m telling you I love you and you already know it” where as hers is more like “oh my god I just love you so much I love you more than anyone I need you to know right now how much I love you.”

Now, I found this on tumblr. I’m not sure if it’s Jerry goofing around on set, or if it’s from a deleted part of the scene:The fact that she’s reaching out for it makes me think that it’s actually Carly. Because why would Miranda care? It’s not like it’s really her bra. And if she just wanted to see it, then wouldn’t he be handing it to her? I know we can see the camera, but that doesn’t mean they weren’t filming when this photo was taken. They could have deleted this part because they decided they didn’t want to add something funny like that to interrupt the emotions.

It’s kind of interesting that they would have included that as a set piece. I mean, of course Carly is going to pack her bras to take with her to Italy. I’ve never been to Italy but I’m pretty sure they wear bras there too, especially visitors. But it’s not like the audience needed to see it. We’ve seen Spencer actually in his underwear but underage female Carly’s bra is sort of an odd choice. So I’m choosing to think of it as like this weirdly fated sexual aspect that somehow found its way in.

And then look at this:In the version of the hug that we saw on TV, Spencer doesn’t swing her around. So maybe there is a different version of this scene that exists. I wouldn’t be surprised if Nickelodeon wants to release some extended version for $. But it seems more likely that it’s just Jerry and Miranda foolin’.

Carly goes upstairs and has her goodbye moment with Freddie. Official worst scene of the episode. He’s packing up his camera gear for iCarly, and this probably upsets her a little, seeing the studio being dismantled. She puts her hand right on his, which causes him to stop talking, then she puts her hand on his shoulder, and leans in to kiss him. He puts his hand on her waist, and kisses back. The kiss – short and not particularly passionate, ends, and Freddie clears his throat. Then she clears her throat, and he clears his again. Then she changes the subject and talks about taking her bags downstairs. Freddie follows her, and we see him lift his hands up triumphantly.

WTF.

Dan Schneider, you hobknocker! Why you gotta do me this way? Not only do Sam and Freddie not get back together, but Freddie and Carly GET A KISS?!!!!!!

I don’t have any delusions. This was not a platonic kiss on either of their parts. This was not Carly saying, “ I know you’ve always had a crush on me, have this kiss as my goodbye gift.” It was more of a “The idea that we could have something will always exist.” They would not have felt so awkward if it had just been a friendly goodbye kiss, and anyway, friendly goodbye kisses on the mouth DON’T REALLY EXIST.

Freddie pumping his arms in the air is probably the worst part of all, because it indicates that he has gotten something that he wanted.

Someone on tumblr suggested that what Freddie was actually happy about was getting some closure and a small victory on his crush on Carly – that he now knows that he’s over her. That’s some spin I can admire. I do want to think that perhaps this was just paying homage to the fact that Freddie’s crush on Carly was a pretty big part of the show. Even if he’s not interested in her like that anymore, he still needed some payoff on his years of pain and humiliation.

Let me bring up a few things: 1) Carly had just been getting excited about the boys in Italy, and Freddie had been laughing when that convinced her go to Italy, 2) Carly was extremely supportive of Freddie and Sam’s relationship when they were dating – basically, she was a shipper, 3) A billion other things about why Carly’s feelings for Freddie in this scene don’t make any sense.

Some people were saying that it was character assassination for Carly to have done this – kissed her best friend’s ex-boyfriend. Obviously I think Sam definitely still has major feelings for Freddie and that we’ve seen minor hints of that, and I feel like Carly is a good enough friend that she should have realized that. But I also don’t think that’s totally fair. Sam doesn’t have some sort of eternal claim on Freddie (yet!), and there’s too much between Freddie and Carly for Sam to always factor in. (Plus didn’t Carly date Freddie first, in iSaved Your Life?)

Another thing to remember is Sam and Cat. Not only does Dan need to set up that show by leaving Sam free, but he also needs people to want to watch it – what better way than to postpone the resolution of the most popular ship to the spin-off. Because even if Creddie are endgame, we still don’t have proper resolution on Sam and Freddie, at least not a resolution that is in any way satisfying or respectful.

Spin-offs: screwing everything up since their invention.

Of course, I think what Dan Schneider did here was mostly him trying to appease both sides of the triangle.  (Or spite both sides of the triangle.) Of course trying to please both sides of any love triangle is usually a one way street to being universally hated. You can’t please everyone, Dan. Making it seem like Sam and Freddie want to get back together, and then having Carly sneak in for an out-of-nowhere romantic kiss is not the way to end a love triangle.

Why doesn’t he just have Sam imprint on Carly and Freddie’s infant son? That would work, too. Or maybe turn Freddie into a vampire, and with all of his heightened emotions he’ll go completely back to preferring Carly. Or maybe Sam could turn out to actually be Freddie’s sister, and somehow they both knew it all along. Or maybe Carly could die, and Sam and Freddie can live out their life together but then Carly and Freddie meet up again in a sort of sideways purgatory -universe before heading into the afterlife. ALL OF THOSE IDEAS SUCK BALLS AND THEY’RE STILL BETTER RESOLUTIONS TO A LOVE TRIANGLE THAN THIS CRAP.

What’s clear here is that Dan Schneider didn’t want to commit to either side of the triangle and wanted it left open, especially with Sam’s spin-off in mind.

Dan Schneider, you officially suck. After iLove You, I revoked his status as a writer I had complete confidence in, and I didn’t think it was possible, but I’m knocking him down another peg to “sometimes does it half right.” (I mean, I’m making peace with what is happening to Spencer and Carly here, but splitting them up isn’t exactly what I wanted either, is it?)

Overall Creddie fans were pleased, but I think that’s mostly because they didn’t actually think they were going to get much, and then they got this. I think if they thought about it a little more, they would be less thrilled. I read of a few who didn’t like how awkward Carly and Freddie were after the kiss. And how about the fact that Carly got these amazing goodbyes with Sam and Spencer, but not Freddie? Just a kiss?

To pile things on, Jennette McCurdy tweeted this:SEDDIE MAKES NO SENSE TO YOU? What a perfect way to insult the majority of your fans, because it makes sense to them.I can only assume that she saw all the hate against Dan and Creddie and decided to intervene. Like that time Ryan Murphy was getting barraged by hate tweets, so the Glee cast started tweeting supportive messages about him. LMAO. Apparently she’s never said anything like this before, and Miranda has even shown support for Seddie in the past. I know some of the fans of this show are young and new to the real world, but I’ve learned in my time that you can’t pay attention to anything an actor says, especially if it’s about shipping issues. Their words are not their own. They’ve all got agendas. And friendships. Loyalties. Policies. They’re employees. And most importantly: they don’t write the show.

(I did see something about Nathan Kress having a new girlfriend. There are enough Nathan/Jennette shippers to create some awkwardness. I saw some speculation that Jennette rejecting Seddie might have been related to Nathan’s girlfriend. Not even necessarily because of actual romantic entanglements, just matters of perception.)

I really hate that she said that about Seddie, because I can’t help it: it really makes me like her less. She could easily have said she preferred Creddie without shitting all over Seddie fans. Right?

(Even though the pictures of her crying on set as the show was ending, and the tales that they kept having to stop filming because she was crying uncontrollably, really make me love her.)

(You can see that Miranda was crying too!)

Dan had these things to say about the Freddie/Carly kiss:

Some fans think that the kiss in this scene has some “relationship” significance.  I think they’re reading too much into it.  There’s no doubt that Carly and Freddie love each other as friends.  All the characters in iCarly love each other, very much.  Does this kiss between Carly and Freddie mean more than deep friendship?  Who knows?  If there’s ever an iCarly reunion, maybe we’ll deal with that.  But in this scene, it’s really just a warm moment of love, friendship between a guy and girl who care very much about each other, and are sad that that won’t be seeing each other for a while.

And:

As we filmed a few takes of this scene, one of the writers suggested that Freddie raise his arms victoriously as he walks out behind Carly. We all thought it was a funny idea, so for the last few takes, Nathan did that – and it made us laugh. Do his raised arms mean that Freddie feels he finally “got” Carly? Or is he just psyched, the way any guy is when he gets to kiss a nice, sweet girl like Carly Shay? For now, that’s subject to anyone’s personal interpretation. I feel that the best writing sometimes leaves a few questions unanswered, so that fans can have discussions and apply their own feelings to some characters’ words and actions. I have a feeling that, some day, I’ll be writing more words and actions for these characters. I sure hope so.

So it was a “deep friendship” kiss. LMAO.

What a tool.

If you want to leave something up to interpretation, actually make it ambiguous. OK? Don’t just say that it’s ambiguous. And quit pandering to your fans like this. I’d think it was hilarious, but I’m too angry about it.

Oh, so you want me to discuss, and apply my own feelings here? NO, I DON’T ACTUALLY THINK THAT YOU DO.

Also, I hope the writer who suggested Freddie’s arm pump dies slowly in a fire.

*calming breath*

Just to be clear: I don’t actually hope that anyone dies. Just a nice third degree burn. (LOL, I went back and took out a lot of swearing. You’re now seeing the “nice” version of my rant.)

Also: where’s my deep siblingship on-the-mouth kiss between Spencer and Carly, eh?

I dislike/oppose Creddie as a threat to Seddie (and because, narratively speaking, it just doesn’t make any sense to me). I don’t really consider Creddie a threat to Spencer/Carly because there will never be two people more perfect for each other than Spencer and Carly, and there is literally nothing that can change that. And they will always have each other no matter what.

And…just think about this for a minute. Carly has this huge, emotional goodbye with Spencer, most of which consisted of them sitting on her bed, telling each other how much they like and love each other and will miss each other. Now, she realized right away that leaving Spencer was a big deal, but it’s probably just now beginning to settle in, especially after the moment they just had and that fantastic hug. (And her face during that hug. Recall the GIF!) But she doesn’t have time to think about that – she’s got other people to say goodbye to. So she goes up to the studio to have her private farewell with Freddie. And out of nowhere, she kisses him. Odd, right? Unless the kiss was actually about Spencer.

That’s right. You heard me. Yes, I am about to make the Carly/Freddie kiss about Carly and Spencer. (And a big thanks to Drew from the comments below who put me on this path.)

Just imagine Carly walking away from her goodbye with Spencer with all of these overwhelming (and confusing?) feelings. She sees Freddie, and kisses him. But maybe the person she actually wanted to kiss (subconsciously or even consciously – heck, this is the finale, why not?).  There are two possibilities I want to see: 1) she’s either spending these leftover Spencer feelings on Freddie, or 2) she’s trying to murder those Spencer feelings (again, consciously or subconsciously) by urgently trying to replace them with Freddie feelings.

And think about the awkwardness after the kiss. It could definitely be interpreted as her feeling as if she has made a mistake. I mean, she doesn’t smile at Freddie, she changes the subject and leaves. I could definitely see her thinking that she wants to kiss Freddie (but really it’s Spencer she wants to kiss – for third time, consciously or subconsciously), and then realizing, after kissing Freddie, that it wasn’t at all what she wanted or needed.

Not that this is fair to Freddie in any way. In fact, if we go with the Spencer/Carly interpretation of the Carly/Freddie kiss, than the “closure” interpretation of the fist pump is actually the kindest for Freddie. That way this kiss could be about two people fully realizing the other two people that they’re meant to be with. I mean, that’s just beautiful.

Spencer and his dad have this great moment where Colonel Shay says, “You would have been a great lawyer,” and Spencer says, “I would have been the worst lawyer,” and then his dad says, “I know.”

And then Spencer adds: “Just keep sending money.” Hahaha. I hope he does keep sending him money, even though he’s taking Carly with him.

Colonel Shay takes the elevator down with Carly’s luggage, and Gibby says, “Wow, your dad is a good looking man.” LOL. Gibby tells it like it is. Good thing Carly doesn’t have legs up to the ceiling and we didn’t see her slow dance with Colonel Shay or we would have had a Pretty Little Liars situation on our hands.“Goodbye you guys,” Carly says, sort of awkwardly.

And then Gibby, bless him, starts crying like a little boy. Like it starts out as a whimper and, I don’t know, it just really moved me. There was never been an emotional component to his relationship with the rest of the characters, so I needed to see this. And then Carly has him do his catchphrase (saying his name in a certain way) one more time, and then they hug.

There’s a big group hug:

Carly and Sam have their big goodbye on the elevator. It was rough, obviously. I actually think Sam took it a little too well. I think this must be her new maturity showing, because she tends to be very possessive of Carly and has sabotaged her efforts to leave (once for a semester at sea, and once to another school) in the past. I’d have liked to see her a bit more put out, actually. But I guess that comes later. Just as I imagine Spencer sobbing his heart out in bed that night.

There’s a scene at the airport, and Carly on the tarmac about to take off, and I thought, No, oh my God no, Spencer is still going to somehow meet up with Audrey.

BUT HE DIDN’T!

I love that 1) Spencer chose taking Carly to the dance over his one chance to meet up with his ex without a second thought, and 2) him getting sick would have prevented the meeting anyway. Audrey wasn’t meant to be. None of the girls he dated were meant to be with Spencer. THE SHOW ENDS WITH HIM SINGLE!!!!!!!! PRAISE THE LITTLE BABY JESUS.

That’s what I meant about Dan Schneider turning my fear of Spencer winding up with someone on its head. Spencer almost ends up with someone, then it gets completely dashed by fate (the sickness) and by his own desire (taking Carly to the dance instead).

And as for Carly ending up with someone? There wasn’t even a boy for her in this episode (not even really this season) – I keep forgetting about Freddie, LOL, but I really just don’t count it – and that gets turned on its head because she does leave Spencer for someone else, but it’s their Dad!

There is one major miracle I want to address: Carly has never set Spencer up with anyone. She has an older brother that she thinks the world of, who is constantly single but constantly looking for a lady, and she has never once tried to fix him up with any woman. (Despite the fact that he has found several of his romantic conquests though her life – Gibby’s mother, two of her teachers, etc.) And she certainly doesn’t try to find him any female friends in iFind Spencer Friends. I truly do think that it’s remarkable that we’ve never had a storyline like that. It makes it so much easier to imagine that while she may not realize it yet, she really does just want Spencer all to herself. (My fanfic deals with Spencer having a serious girlfriend, because I think Carly, when faced for real with the chance of losing her position as the center of Spencer’s universe, would freak the freak out.)

And she really hasn’t helped him out with his relationships much. Her form of advice is usually just boosting his ego.

While on the plane, Carly puts in some headphones and watches the first ever iCarly on her laptop. I guess she’s really super interested in quality time with her Dad (!) Everyone flashes back to the first episode when they were first developing the webshow, with bittersweet smiles.

Spencer sits down at home on the couch, probably the feeling that he’s all alone sinking in for the first time. He picks up an item discussed in his flashback, and it spontaneously combusts, which was the perfect homage to the running gag of Spencer basically being an accidental pyromaniac.

I still have so much discuss, and it’s difficult for me to decide which order to put it in.

I’m not going to say anything more about Seddie vs. Creddie. It has some relevance to this blog because Creddie goes against Spencer/Carly and Seddie supports it in several ways, but I think I’ve covered it enough. Obviously I was not pleased, but with the spin-off and Dan Schneider trying to piss everyone off by not indicating either ship as endgame, I really shouldn’t have expected anything else. I can conceive of worse endings to that aspect, so maybe I should be a little bit thankful. Also, Carly leaving is the perfect way for Freddie and Sam to find their way back to each other. One of the best Seddie fics I ever read started with Carly moving to Europe.

I liked seeing Colonel Shay. Carly missing him and wanting him to be around isn’t new – iWon’t Cancel The Show and iMeet The First Lady both focus heavily on her relationship with her father. (Although I have to wonder whether Michelle Obama agreeing to be on the show made them write a story about military families and their sacrifices.)

But I kind of resent the finale being so much about Carly’s relationship with her father. He hasn’t been non-existent, but the relationship has never been particularly important. It has always been more like Carly has a little list of expected interactions with their father, and her missing him only comes up when her expectations are not met. We don’t see her lamenting on a daily basis her incomplete life without him. I’m digging myself a bad hole here: of course she misses her father and wishes she saw him all the time. But why is the finale about this? Except to set up the idea that it’s realistic for her to choose to go with him. And why does she have to go with him? Because that’s how they make the show end. So in a lot of ways I see Carly deciding to go with her father as having to do with plot necessities. And of course her leaving is what drove most of the emotion of the ending. We couldn’t get all of these revved up finale emotions unless there was something emotional going on within the show.

As for Carly deciding to go with her father, I have a lot say about that. Obviously, we don’t know how long she’s going for. They make it seem like a long time, what with the extremely emotional goodbyes, and her father talking about school. But she could go for only a few months, right? Maybe until Christmas. A semester. Who wouldn’t jump at the chance to go live in Italy for a while, especially with the Dad you never see. And it’s not like Spencer has a job or a girlfriend. He could come visit. He could even move there, too. (Although I would prefer if he kept the apartment. It’s his and Carly’s apartment. It’s their place. It’s designed to their tastes. It fits them. I have so many feelings about them in that apartment.)

And I can totally see Carly going, planning on staying for a while, but then she realizes that she misses her friends and Spencer too much and wants to go back home.

In fact, in a lot of ways it’s a very positive thing, because maybe she needs to be apart from Spencer in order to realize just how much she should never, ever be apart from him. And probably even more importantly, she’ll have had a time when she lived with someone else, which is probably a much healthier foundation for their relationship. That way no one can say, “How do you know that’s what you really want? You’ve never had anything else.”
And living with her real father will take Spencer even further away from any sort of paternal role. It’ll probably enhance her ability to not see him as her guardian any longer.

Also, Carly took about 3 minutes to decide to go. She had to be on the plane in, like, five hours. And all she’s thinking about is how her Dad is leaving right then and she won’t see him again until God knows when. Maybe when she starts realizing what she has done, she’ll start cutting this down to more of a vacation than a permanent move.

So, I talked about Carly going to college far away being one of my fears for the finale, and I can see you thinking that her moving to Italy is sort of the same thing, but for all of the reasons above, I see it as sort of different. Especially since Carly is choosing to go with her and Spencer’s father. She’s still choosing family. She’s not chasing a boy to Chicago, she’s not going to communications school in Boston.

And, as someone who has gone to college in another state, and spent a semester abroad, I can tell you that some people just get homesick. Some people just want to go back home to their families. No matter how awesome the new location is. A nice adventure, some new experiences, and then a return to the warmth and comfort of the place where you’ve always known that you belonged. That’s what it was like for me. I went to school far away with the intention of settling permanently where I had come from. I just took the chance of college to experience another place. (In retrospect, it’s not a very good idea for people who have trouble making friends. Because all my college friends live all over the country. But I can’t quite regret it either.)

Oh, and I was saving this to mention it at the right place and now I’m not even sure what that place is, but when Carly is listing all of the fun things she has in mind for her to do with her father and Spencer, she says, “And Spencer and I were thinking about getting a puppy.” She was thinking their father could come with them to look at puppies. Now, look at Spencer and Carly’s relationship. It’s just like Spencer said: she took care of herself. Despite him being the guardian, and being 12 years older, they found an equality and a balance in their relationship. So getting a puppy is their decision, together. It will be their puppy, and their responsibility. A puppy is an investment. So I can’t really see Carly thinking about getting a puppy with Spencer and then moving out. It seems to me that this puppy business is a total indication of her plans to stay there in that apartment with him and raise that puppy like it’s their little child. Basically husband and wife Spencer and Carly were about to become daddy and mommy Spencer and Carly.

And do you remember the last time we had a mention of a dog on the show? In my favorite Spencer/Carly episode ever, iDate Sam and Freddie, Gibby, who figures that he’ll be spending more “quality time” with Carly (wink, wink) now that Sam and Freddie are a couple, gets a dog and tries to get Carly to raise it with him. She rejects the idea instantly and vehemently and never wavers. So basically Gibby was saying that he and Carly were an inevitable item now (pair the spares), and that this should be symbolized by the dog they share. And here we have that same idea, except Carly is accepting/instigating it. That’s also the episode that ends with Spencer and Carly’s accidental date!

(Oh, and while we’re talking about iDate Sam and Freddie, there was a scene in that episode with Spencer and Carly basically vicariously make out with each other by fake making out with air while standing right in front of each other. I knew there was something vaguely romcom about it, but then I realized that there are actually two couples right off the top of my head that end up actually making out when they start doing just what Spencer and Carly were doing – Jeff and Britta in the first paint ball episode of Community, and then Robin and Barney in the episode Disaster Averted of How I Met Your Mother. You need to know this, obviously.)

Also, I know this couple that has been dating for a long time but it doesn’t seem like they have any plans to get married. But when they got a dog together I knew they were as good as married.

So, yeah. I think that’s it. I planned to write maybe a couple of pages in Word, now I’m at 12. Oops. Oh well, Sparly deserved this. It’s not like I’ll ever be writing about them again. Not like this.

I also kind of feel like theme song – Leave It All To Me – was written for me and this blog/post:

I know you see

Somehow the world will change for me

And be so wonderful

–

There’s no chance unless you take one

And the time to see the brighter side of every situation,

Some things are meant to be

So give me your best and leave the rest to me

–

I will make you change your mind

These things happen all the time

And it’s all real

I’m telling you just how I feel

Basically, it’s about me seeing the brighter side, and changing the world to fit what I want, and me telling you all how I feel. How appropriate.

I can’t listen to this song now without getting emotional. It’s just so happy, which makes me even more sad. I’ve always liked the song a lot, and now it just reminds me that the show is over. There will never be another new episode. There will never be a new scene between these characters.

I can’t believe iCarly is over.

Spencer/Carly 4eva.

Dan Schneider mentioned writing these characters again. He may have meant Sam and Cat. He may have meant a reunion movie in the future, or who knows, maybe even a new season in the future like is happening more and more with old popular shows. I just want to say, it could be good to see more of these guys, and especially the possibility of a Sam/Freddie canon endgame. But I would consider that – like a spinoff – to be optional canon. Frankly I’m not sure I want anyone messing with my post-finale headcanons.

Before leaving off, I did want to let you know about an AWESOME iCarly fanfic (that works as a great optional canon-compliant continuation of mine) that is here.

And, for those of you Spencer/Carly shippers who might be looking for a similar sort of ship, I think Ben and Kate Fox on Ben and Kate (which is on Fox! LOL) make for a nice successor.

And now I’m going to spam you with cast, and cast looking sad, and Jerry and Miranda being adorable: